Grown-up kids

The past couple of weeks I've been thinking about gift-giving. It was an "easy" Christmas in terms of shopping this year, in that I bought gifts online for the kids in August, and the three nieces prefer to receive $$$ - the wish that buys other wishes - for their own future spending. I also bought my parents' gifts online during the summer too.

I think I'm now in a mode of being on the lookout all year round, and buying when there are sales, and saving up gifts for occasions. I have gifts in reserve for kids' birthday parties we/they are invited to, baby showers, impromptu out-of-town visits from friends with children, play dates hosted by others...

As I'm looking online today, I am buying for my niece's birthday...in April, but also, since it's the online Lego store, there are some free stand-alone add-ons that would be good for Valentine's Day, or Chinese New Year...

I think I will always be a kid at heart - I much prefer to have "gift with purchase" when it comes to Lego, than, say, Clinique bonus time...

I also like Kinder Surprise eggs almost as much as the kids do. I like that it's not just about eating candy, but a small toy that can be built and be a momentary diversion. For my two kids, it's a double bonus, because they are both flexible about swapping, and sharing.

I buy educational toys that I myself would have some interest in playing with, or engaging with. I am selective in the books, magazines, board games, card games, and other print-based toys they receive also. I join in playing with Play-Doh sometimes, and I like playing with new Play-Doh just as much as the kids' do, rather than fight with the muted purple, grayish, "still good" batch.

My spouse is the same way - he has "classic" toys of his childhood that he is slowly passing down to the kids, though he has robots in the original packaging that may never see the light of day. We also picked up a PS4 and WiiU, and these are for the whole family.

We will transition eventually to a time when the kids will have allowances, and full spending authority over relatives and others giving cash gifts, and they will make their own decisions, good and bad, about spending. I really think the best way to learn about money is to handle it on your own, and to experience some buyers' remorse. But for now, they are in a 'receiving' mode, and we are trying not to spoil them. It's difficult when you are spoiling yourself as well.

Christmas morning

Awake before the kids...but should sleep again so I can keep up with them after they open their gifts! They are getting a Hape furnished house with family & pets, a set of indoor/outdoor gorilla blocks, and a Spielgaben version 2! This is a no-batteries Christmas, though the house required assembly.

We have a pine Christmas tree with lights, and edible treats. Later today we will head to a family gathering for afternoon play and dinner.

They are 4 & 2 years old this Christmas, and this Christmas only.

Merry Christmas, or season's greetings, to you and yours!

Winter concert!

Ah, the time-honoured tradition of the winter concert! It was very well done, with the kids sitting "criss-cross applesauce" in a circle, with several short, action-oriented, well-rehearsed songs in their repertoire. The families sat back in chairs and took photo and video.

After, the kids presented crafts they had worked on, beautifully teacher-wrapped, with hand-written cards attached.

It was such a nice way to start the day, to drop off one's four year old and then return for a presentation.

The kids were so proud of themselves, too!

These things take hard work, but then look easy!

I am reminded at all these steps along the way how nice it is to attend a neighborhood school. No need to show up two hours ahead to reserve a row of seats, no jostling with other families...just quiet appreciation for one's own and others' children.

Pulling the teacher card

My friend, a kindergarten teacher, is on leave from teaching to be at home with her 3-turning-4 year old and 1 year old. I have a B.Ed and maintain OCT certification, but did not teach in the classroom. (I tutored but not in a school). It does mean that we have a different perspective as our children have started junior kindergarten in the public school system. We view this transition as teachers as well as parents.

She is experiencing some differences of opinion with the teacher at her son's school, and isn't sure whether to reveal that she's a teacher. For now, she hasn't felt the need, not to pull rank, but to assert a certain level of authority to validate her views. If she isn't heard as a parent, she can perhaps make the point that she has recent relevant experience, as it were, and address the other teacher as a colleague, from the same side of the school fence...

For my part, I think I also might wait until there is a purpose and good reason for which to disclose that I too, have teaching qualifications. On the school trip, I think I was moved to be somewhat more directive towards the kids, even those not in my group, reinforcing what the teachers were saying, but also to engage with them more, and get to know them, recognizing them as the interesting individuals that they are, at 3-5 years old. It seemed to me that the other parent volunteers hung back, content to gather their groups around them like extended family on an outing.

I think we are also aware of how much is going on in the classroom that we aren't seeing, so we take the opportunities we have to infer and to observe. We learn who our child's peers are, we are attuned to what they are learning, we consult the classroom website, we participate in or take positions on the parent council, we elicit feedback from our children on what the teachers say on a daily basis. We read all the paperwork carefully, and send carefully-crafted notes back. We read the curriculum standards and note what new things the children are able to do.

I am going to be taken up on my offer to volunteer in the classroom on occasion. I'm looking forward to contributing and also observing, this path not taken...to be continued!

Not friends any more

Tyler, who had for the past few days had been telling me his favorite was T, that they both liked dinosurs, told me this week that they are no longer friends...

He says T told him "friends don't last forever," and that T's mom told him it's good to make new friends all the time, so you can be happier. It seems Tyler and his (former?) friend thought it was indeed a good idea to take a break and branch out. T is playing with another boy, C these days, and Tyler is back to being friends with an SK girl, P.

I said this thing about "friends don't last forever" was sad, but Tyler said earnestly that it didn't make him sad.

It seems I am projecting on him, and wishing for deeper attachments to these schoolyard and classroom interactions.

It is likely very healthy for all the kids to have flexible attachments and mix up in various groups. It's good to learn to get along with everyone.

Today he says he made a new friend, C, and made friends with a girl whose name he didn't know. They are from the other class, but they share the same play area.

So, again, the lesson is to not worry too much. He has lots of friends, in different contexts. He is friendly with other kids he meets for the first time or sees in passing. He is a happy-go-lucky kid and is likeable.

I just need to get over the "friends don't last forever" line. I couldn't help it. I told him family lasts forever...

Secret lives of preschoolers

My 2.5 year old daughter is most content, when playing on her own, to enact and narrate scenes with various Duplo people, Lego minifigures, Playmobil figures, Little People, and their various envrionments: a plane, a jungle scene, a cavalry of horses, a pirate ship. She chatters incessantly while I surf on my Nexus 5, both of us absorbed and not needing the other, but sitting back to back, sometimes literally within the same breathing space.

I look up, and she has a few of them seated in a circle around a makeshift feast, or lined up for some ceremonial task, or neatly seated in the plane, waiting for takeoff or having landed, for the seat-belt sign to blink off?

She is the master of their fate. I catch words here and there, but she knows exactly what she's saying, and content to let it play out.

She has taken to carrying a few of these little figures around with her the way other kids carry a "stuffy" around, or the way her brother used to carry Hot Wheels cars around, and then tow trucks, and now dinosaurs.

This is play, said to be rehearsal for real life, and yet, it IS her life, right now.

Snow?

I think the Halloween rain drizzle may have turned into overnight snow. Haven't looked out the window yet.

We have rain boots, snow boots, snow bibs, winter coats, hats, mittens.

Tyler has been asking to build a snowman, in the complete absence of snow...