Three month old daughter

14 weeks old: 5.72 kg, 61 cm. There was a time when I wondered if I loved her as much as her older brother, because the same level of intensity wasn't there. Eventually I realized that this was the ease of having a second child. With the firstborn, it's exhilarating & terrifying, and you are both love-struck & shell-shocked. You love your baby so much and are full of anxiety that they will stop breathing. I am able to enjoy this infant time now that I know what comes next...rolling, crawling, separation anxiety, walking, talking, weaning...it must be said too that objectively, she's an easy baby. She set her own schedule within a few weeks without my having to establish it or reinforce it. She feeds well and sleeps well. Like her brother, she has a certain amount of maturity, even as a newborn. These are my 'old soul,' 'wise' children.

Personality

I noticed two months ago a new level of sophistication in Tyler: he knows how to 'play the system.' Grandma asked him to tell her when the 'Toopy & Binoo segment ended.' The half hour show has subtle transitions and music changes between mini-episodes. When the time came, he looked askance at me to see if I would give him away. I didn't, and he shifted and settled into watching another. A month ago his new thing was lining up similar toys in orderly rows. This weekend we went to a friend's house with an inflatable pool, and he found a bucket, filled it, and carries it to a dirt patch to water it. He did this until he empties half the pool. He wasn't interested in sitting in the pool, but kept circling it. Today he's doing the same thing, playing with all the toy ducks from outside the pool. I think he likes to experiment and engage in an activity without getting right into the middle of it. I've heard he does the same at circle time, circling the group and looking on. Perhaps he'll be a film director or product tester coordinator...

Parenting 2.0

With a second child, you can be a better parent because you not only have more experience, you know to carve out time for yourself as an individual, to nourish and sustain who you are apart from being a parent.

Two months old

This time around, some things have so easily become familiar, such as knowing when to pick her up before she becomes upset, anticipating when she wil spit up, making mental notes of how she likes to be carried, recognizing when she's feeding and when she's pacifying herself. At the same time, I forget that incrementally, she's developing and hitting milestones. The movement of her limbs has become more coordinated. She's learned how to self-soothe by sucking on her fist or arm. She coos in turn and looks at me inquiringly. She's filling out 3 month clothes and while we thought she only had a right cheek dimple, it turns out she may have a matching one on the other cheek. I'm going to let her hair grow out in the back to see how long it can grow. A second-born child doesn't get to do everything first, but by the time they arrive on the scene, everything has been prepared for them...all the conditions for success are already in place. The experimental trials are over and they benefit from parents who have greater knowledge and experience. They also have an older sibling to look out for them, who is just a little ahead in the work of being a kid. Two months, and I feel as well as I did, if not better, as when Tyler was six months old. I may have ten months then, to enjoy the time away from work. The thing to do is make the most of the nice, warm weather. Once winter sets in, I'll be back at work before it gets really warm again at he very beginning of Spring. We will have to store up the outdoor time before we are stuck indoors on dark winter days. Two months old already!

If I don't write it down...

I feel like I'll lose it. It's why I keep documenting, though not everything ends up here. Today was a busy day in the household, but I am quiet with the three week old on the still small centre of things. She's a little satellite in orbit around me. Left to ourselves in the house this evening, she curled up and fell asleep in my lap like a cat. She looks different day to day and demonstrates more awareness day to day as well, craving contact, settling when talked to, experimenting with moving her head about, more control over her arms and hands. Having a second means you know what to cherish and what to look forward to, as you see thisbomh target of development that is your toddler. I am still wholly charmed by my toddler, who picked dandelions today, and clutched them in a bunch on one hand while being carried back inside. Adults put things down and pick them up again. Toddlers hold into things or give them to a someone to hold for safekeeping, or dramatically throw them aside.

Love the way...

23mo's eyes light up when he spots an object of desire: a melon ice bar I'm eating that he's confident I'll share with him (I do, we practice taking turns), his baby sis when he comes in to say goodnight to her, anything in a box, a puppy seen from indoors, the back door opening and his first steps outside to play.

2 week old's eyes are surveying the scene while she's awake, head turtling from side to side. Even at this age, I sense she is settling in: able to be more easily calmed by familiar voices, touch, and smells; starting to recognize what happens right before she's fed; when being changed is ending and she will be comfortable again; that bath time isn't so scary; that she is being cared for.

Imitation

Figured out why Tyler once in a while lies on his stomach and puts his arms behind his back, palms up...he's taking on the posture of Ashley, who likes to be swaddled. It's also why when he sees her lying down on one side he snuggles up alongside, facing her, feigning sleep. He makes cursory attempts to soothe her when she cries, with a conciliatory pat, but backs off when her crying escalates...'you take her,' he seems to say.

Meanwhile, baby girl's face is filling out, her hair is getting longer, and her fingernails will need to be cut soon again. She likes to be swaddled and to co-sleep...I think she'll be cuddly for a long time.